cant believe you said you would bone perez hilton
i said paris hilton
thats even worse
Best walk of shame ever. Not only did I not remember his name or the fact that we fucked, they all watched as I tried to get into 3 cars that werent mine
Oh and I threw up on myself...
let me put it this way. im never saying "join in or get out" again unless i know whos in the room.
Nothing on google about my condom issue. However, if you get a chance google: condom with teeth.
Why am I a bad person? You were the one trying to get people to eat tape.
Oh you know, watching its always sunny and petting his cat and NOT fucking. I'm starting my whorefree 2012 resolution early.
That one dude should feel honored if he were to get herpes from you. Fuck that Guy. He is a herpe.
Dude I woke up and he was pissing in the corner on his clothes... I called his name an he replied " I got this" and continued.
If you can't seal the deal with her, I will. And you know I'll be successful. So there's your incentive
Bouncer came into the bathrooms to tell us the old one-person-per-stall rule, realised it was two girls banging, and left us to it. Lesbiperks.
Oh my god I'm in a public bathroom with a space heater. I never want to leave
Went and sat in the wrong fucking class for 30 mins, answering questions and shit. What ever this is i will be on it for the rest of the semester.
He was publicly touching my boobs before I even knew he's a famous World Cup skier.... That's how hot he was
I woke up to him crying and pouring pixy stix in my mouth saying they would bring me back to life.
You are currently doing Harry Potter spells with the turkey-baster...
Randomize
