In these economic times, linking arms taking tequilla shots with your boss as an underage girl is the best job security I can think of
never have i ever had a craving for dick this badly
I thought about puking over the balcony or the bathroom and figured the balcony seemed much funner.
Just got invited out of group to take shots after hearing her gay friend say "why would I give him my alcohol so you can suck his dick. It's going to be a good night
I definitely hasselhoffed a taco bell burrito on my kitchen floor in front of my dad and little brother.
Rehydrating your liver back to life is never a good idea.
Well two things you gotta know if you're gonna live here. your alcohol tolerance is gonna need to go up, and people do blow. Get used to it. Nobody is gonna pressure you into it. That shits expensive
Apparently stumbling across interstate bridges is not cause for concern but screaming Wookie noises at cars is. Thanks, cops.
Oh boy. Send him a care package with laxative cookies and alcohol. So he can shit himself while he's passed out drunk.
Was it fun? The night started with home made Jager and ended in him falling out of a tree with a pocket full of house numbers...you tell me.
The Universe is CLEARLY playing a bad joke on your sex life
Me and Jason had to grab your legs and arms and drag you in the house. You kept screaming "leave me for dead"
I feel like David Hasselhoff when he's drunk eating that cheeseburger and crying. But with cheesecake.
I have rug burns on my nipples. Thanks for being an awesome wing girl.
Best and worst whiskey dick ever. I am hungover and can't move from the hours of sex, he on the other hand has a raw bruised dick. I win.
Randomize
