Fuck, operation next sex victim is on as soon as i get back. Do not sleep with that red head, nobody likes accidental ginger babies.
pube in her braces AGAIN. barely kept a straight face.
Whats the name of the guy with his hand down my pants?
she pulled the sheets over her head to blow me but the static kept making little lightning bolts and I was too high and got really scared she was going to electrocute me.
just had to explain to the health center why i wanted 50 condoms a month.
It's official, no more fat chicks or even close to that, my balls are 2 dimentional
I got shot at today. If that doesn't get me at least a blow job I give up working on the south side
I once puked on the side of the hwy driving home and it somehow made me feel more Canadian. So don't rule it out
At one point they were sandwiching me, both petting my stomach, mad dogging each other. Then they somehow telepathically decided to both try to pull my pants down. Such nice guys.
my make-up looks really good tonight. I swear it had nothing to do with me finishing all of your strawberry vodka.
SINCE WHEN WAS USING A FROZEN WATER BOTTLE ATTACHED TO A ROPE AS A THROWING WEAPON A GOOD IDEA??
If you can't drink with the big boys, give up your beer and go back to the playpen
DAMN HIS BEARD AND ABILITY TO USE TOOLS ON A LADDER!!
Two grav bong hits and a shower later and I'm ready for company
It's like you say things that speak to my soul on a deep personal level
I HAD SEX WITH COLBY AND HIS FIVE YEAR PLAN IS TO STEAL A REALLY EXPENSIVE PAINTING AND ASKED ME IF ID BE INTO HELPING HIM AND I WOKE UP IN HIS BED TO A WOMANS TUBE TOP NEXT TO ME
Randomize