so i completely puked my brains out. a lot. he held me up so i could brush my teeth. then we proceeded to hook up for the next four hours.
he's a keeper
Is it weird for a girl to post pictures of her dildo no facebook?
i'm crying at olive garden. i've hit rock bottom
I cant believe you went home with her.. Your poor immune system and the shit you put it through.
Best feeling in the world is getting a random boob pic from a drunk chick at 3 am.
I woke up to an alarm on my phone that said "Buy Plan B" and then the guy offered me a hairbrush... which seemed polite at the time
then he grabbed my tit and yelled "FOR NARNIA!!" then dove into my vag. i think I will do him again strictly for the entertainment value
Pulled a muscle in my back masturbating. But still listed as probable.
My liver is whispering mean things about me to my kidneys. It's a fucking miracle I'm not hungover. Lol
Now that it's fall I have to prepare for the imminent arrival of ripped up sweatpants shoved into folded over sequined uggs
I am literally watching TV with sunglasses on because the brightness hurts my hangover
I got all the way to work before I realized there were Trojans in my bra.
It's three am. I'm drunk in a stairwell in Vegas. My flight leaves at six. Help.
Don't read too much into what I just sent. I love you, always have, but I'm drunk and sorry for the confusion.
Which part? The boyfriend or the sex?
Boyfriend. SEX IS ON!!!
Julius Caesar had a huge penis
WTF are you reading?
Ha ha! No, the guy in the Caesar costume last night. We hooked up. His dick was huge
Randomize
