I was so drunk last night i ate cereal with a fork.
we were watching porn and trying to copy the position they were doing now i think my hip is dislocated
My cousin had a baby so we have to look at it. Apparently the event is byob
At this point do you think buying mom a pot plant would be funny or highly inappropriate?
say it with me now .. the "golden" penis. his nickname does not disappoint.
No kidding. I just keep looking at that 'under 21 until 11/21/2011' on my id and whispering "soon enough"
Now all we have to do is pretend we haven't seen each other naked. Work tomorrow is going to be FUN.
is it weird that I didn't think he was hot last night when I was making out with him but right now I'm Facebook stalking him and think he's really attractive??
your beer goggles are on backwards.
She cried the whole movie and got kicked out for saying "[Santa's beard] looks so soft I wanna stick my dick in it." We're going again next week. Drunk animation majors are the best
I think our prof has caught onto our drinking game. He burst into the room with a big smile on his face and yelled "essentially! Essentially! Essentially!"
Maybe is for pussies. We only say yes in this household
Well, I saw an Olympian's genitals tonight, so it can't be that bad.
Still stoned. I like your bong. It can stay. No others, though.
All his ex-girlfriends are delicate flowers, tho. And I'm like a trash compactor.
I wouldn't worry about it. You know what they say, THICK THIGHS MAKE THE DICK RISE.
Someone took a shit in the house somewhere and I STILL can't find it. I'm just going to move.
Randomize
