Good face, no body. And apparently her vagina is related to chewbaca.
Ok so my english teacher told me i could have 5 absences bc of my "problem". I have no idea what she is talking about
he just invited me over for the 3 p's...pepsi pizza and porn...I'm gonna marry him
Legitimately semi-blackout across the table from the governor off a chardonnay i can't even pronounce.
By the end of the night i was making legitimate noises not just saying moo.
I dont think she was a real nurse but she was good at it. wish I rememebrd her name
but he gave me mouthwash after the bj. no ones ever done that for me before.
Itd be like fucking a waterbed thats been locked in a barn for two years.
Where in the FUCK do you get your analogies
Hey, i turned the toilet into a water fountain. Drink up.
He wants me to hook up with his fiance while he watches. Text you later with how it goes.
Honestly I'm so excited to go to bed I feel as if I don't deserve to be in my early twenties.
Regardless of age or alcohol consumption, the knowledge that my dad spanks my mom sexually has the very real potential to fuck my shit up.
i fell into a bathtub last night and broke the fall with my forehead. my forehead is bruised
So our night ended with 6 cruisers, a fire truck, and an ambulance. Also, lots of blood. How was yours?
While I was giving him head he told me he had to go door to door the next day and "spread the word of Jesus Christ" I felt like a Disney villain out to steal his virtue.
Randomize
