Just role played anchorman. And yes, I did take her to pleasure town.
i have more money on itunes than i do in my bank account... college.
Yeah, it kinda sucks. But it was fun while it lasted. And honestly, his penis is way too big for my life.
I think I died last night. I had 14 beers..well 13 1/2 if you count the one that got spilled on the baby in the elevator.
I've known you for the past two years. You never kid about biology or alcohol.
I walking on her passed out on her bed, clutching a burrito and the walking dead dvd on replay.
you regret 100% of the tequila shots you do take. thats what gretzky meant to say
Sobered up midsex and just went with it. After he tried cuddling and I awkwardly rolled out of the bed to find someone on the floor, apparently it was his room so he got to listen.
Why I hate online dating: not even one day in and a 57 year old asks me to call him "Daddy."
he just used a semicolon in the middle of a sext
How do you clean human pee out of a carpet
Inconspicuously
Good, I don't think Coke dipped ring pops hold up in the mail anyway.
I've had more orgasms than showers this week.
I think I fucked the doubts about us out of him
Is talking to an iron man poster a good or bad indicator that you've been drinking too much?
Randomize
