My gift to the freshman: I made an illegal stop, rolled out and dropped to my hands and knees and puked in front of the south campus dorms and about 20 families. Welcome to OSU
it's just like freshman year of high school, with more drugs
Be honest with Daniel. He was a good rebound to you for nine months and he made it so you could be with the one you really love and care for now. Just tell him thanks and best of luck.
She cut off the top of a watermelon and is now eating it with a spoon. She's more than half done.
We're knee deep in HJ's right now.
You can identity the picture as me the mistress his wife and him. It's that kinda awkard.
I like how he had to correct himself in stating that I was the fat one in the threesome.
He could stay over, if you'd just ask.
Yeah. What am I supposed to say? "Oh, my couch is occupied, but my vagina's not"
Well it's like a wise man once told me: "If you're going to shave your balls, don't do it hungover."
He fell backwards into a full bathtub but didn't spill a single drop of the beer in his hand. What a pro.
Matt's offering to breast feed it.
I woke up with a twisted ankle and was covered in lube. Not entirely sure what happened last night
Sorry, was sleeping. I heard a rumor that I had a hangover, so I just went with it...
Over Bumbled last night. I think I set my dog up on a date Sunday afternoon. I have to drive him, meet the other dog’s dad and secretly drink a bottle of champagne from a “water bottle”. This is not what I expected 30 to be like.
In any case. I fucked a married couple recently. Know what a straight person would've done there? Been super weirded out by 1/3 of the genitals there, that's what.
Randomize
