I wanna bring you to show and tell
You were running around the house with a purple crayon asking people to call you harold..
Good ideas don't start with we have a bottle of vodka..
Is it mean that I just sent him a pic of my tits with the header, "say bye bye?"
I found your bra. How you get it off the satellite dish is your problem.
you'll be horrified to know he's visiting next weekend
You two are a rollercoaster of sex and silence.
Speaking of gay, some dude in a life vest just goes, we should pull our dicks out! To larry. Were leaving now. I saw penis
Running across campus through Hurricane Sandy while hammered and in a slutty cowgirl costume obviously should be top priority tonight
You were so stoked after landing that flip that you dropped acid with three random guys without hesitation
We did it in the bar bathroom and the bathroom attendant sold us a condom. I love Nashville
How hard do you think it would be to make a drinking game out of a Slip-N-Slide? Asking for a friend.
Per my usual Thursday, I blacked out and slept on the stairs.
Lol I'm just saying its too early for your penis, I can accept it but at a more decent hour
So. Um. Hypothetically speaking...how would one get a squirrel out of the house?
Obviously you're feeling a little sexually frustrated.
I consider humping a stranger every ten minutes when I walk in the street.
Randomize
