Well I thought I'd be nice but yeah I'm not a fan of you either you're an arrogant stupid cocky unfunny loser. Don't talk to me you're crazy
i want to bang the Snorg tees girl.. shes always smiling ;)
Then you got really excited when I upgraded you from puke bowl to puke bucket.
Balcony sex scratched the shit out of my phone. Whups.
My little brother got home at 4am too, we drunk ate together. It was a kodak moment.
Everytime I see a couple on campus walking and holding hands I just want to yell he's gonna lie!
Recent Google searches: "babu kangarooz"... "why 2 tacos bell" and "is dinosaur in real life"
You could probably play six degrees of separation of my cock in this city.
I'm pretty sure at any given moment you could wring out my liver and get a couple of shots of jäger.
I have the WORST cramps EVER. I think this is gods way of saying 'you're welcome, last warning. stop being a slut.'
like every night i go out someone always suggests nipple hugs so that's why I always end up topless
I'm having post-experience "why didn't I fuck her in a public bathroom" regrets
I’m almost positive this girl is drinking a mojito in class right now, if so she’s my new hero
You only have to pretend to care about soccer until July. HE'S PRETTY DONT RUIN THIS.
Did my roommate wake up in your girlfriend's apartment in drag again?
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