I am not speculating about which disney princesses do and do not have gag reflexes
And then she said we stopped for a train and i tried crawling out the back window.. again, i dont remember this.
I'm doing a half mile walk of shame carrying a trash bag and still very drunk. Save me. I feel like a refugee.
At this point it has been so long i wouldnt know what a dick was if it slapped me in the face.
The best thing he's ever done for me was comment on my profile picture saying "hello boner"
This is a whole other level of drinking. Like the I used to eat paste with these people kinda drinking.
I had fun this weekend too. According to Web MD, my symptoms say I had a miscarriage.
Sometimes I seriously wonder if I could get away with vodka Sundays at work. Cuz this red bull feels naked.
There's never a time that i stay at this apartment that when i wake up in the morning and sit outside to smoke a cigarette that i don't feel ashamed of myself.
You were definitely doing something right. You could only see the colored parts of his eyes a couple of times. I was pretty sure he was dead at some point.
I'll just be here. Naked. Eating tots and jello like a muh fuggin G
I still count it as showing your tits. Even though the wall was the only one who saw anything. Your boyfriend was pissed.
Don't mind me. My boyfriend is carrying me because I'm broken not because I'm drunk.
It's not even 9:30 yet..
The sex definitely would have been a perk. But not sitting in a ditch was what I was going for...
Donated a pint of blood at 6 and pub crawl started at 7. Thank your lucky stars I'm still alive today.
Randomize
