that john and kate plus 8 dude has ruined asians for me
i really wish my pants would only unzip when im sober
this kid at 40 friday greeted another kid by saying "heeey farmville neighbor"
dude.
yep. needless to say i didn't meet anyone and spent yet another friday night masturbating.
for real. he might as well bring dogs if they're lower than a 7.
No, he grudge fucked my ex so I wouldn't be tempted to get back with her. He is either the worst or best friend ever.
I'm hoping you can explain why I woke up with what I believe is pumpkin pie all over my body
He's really hot. I think he's gonna be my reason to shave this winter.
I just made my roommate a 'Hope you don't have chlamydia' cake.
Make one for john too.
Haha yeah this costume is worse than I imagined. I look more like a gothic hooker who caters specifically to creepy men with doll fetishes
eating chex mix on the couch when he walks in naked and asks how he looks. are you shitting me.
Ok so I didn't mean for his first impression of me to be lying face down on his roommates bedrooms floor throwing up my jäger but it happened. Atleast my ass looked good in those jeans. Think I still have a shot?
I just accidentally showed an old lady a pic of my penis while showing her cat pics. So how's your day going?
She didn't complain to the library attendant about us being too loud. She complained after you grabbed her highlighter off the table to stir vodka into your tumbler with.
Do you find Darth Vader masks attractive?
Thanks for reminding me of all the hookups my brain has been trying to suppress...
That's what friends are foooooooor!
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