I didn't go out last night, but I dreamed that I blacked out and the *CRAZY* thing I did was to eat 12 cupcakes off 12 diff plates and stack them up neatly. If I had a life, I'd hate it.
Who were the five players on the alien team from space jam?
we went back to her place to bone only to find her boyfriend having sex.. with MY girlfriend
Not me. I think "beastiality" sounds pretty classy.
I swear god or herbie drove my car home
Renamed my iPod as 'the titantic' so when I plug it in it's says 'the titantic is syncing.'
Single handedly the worst sex I've ever had just went down. Its like we both laid there after word-less thinking about the other " could they be any worse in bed" ?
My dad told me my only assignment from now til graduation is to not die. it's a legit concern for him.
He made me a period mix..should I back out now?
I'm pretty sure I just woke up to one of the airport janitors saying that she wanted to tie me up and do something.. I couldn't hear what, thank god
Dude I walked 1.4 miles through the hotel wearing a cowboy hat, pink topped boots, gucci shades, and a scarf and met my parents in the hallway at 7 am how is this not a good start to Vegas?
All together there was 318 cigarette butts in the pool... And my microwave.
I want to preface this by saying nothing happened, nothing is on fire. It is mere speculation. Do we have a fire extinguisher?
What exactly do I say to a random stoner hookup to thank him for ending my dry spell? Is it awkward to just say "Thanks for that. It was well needed."
Is there such thing as a tasteful dick pic? I think I just got one if they exist.
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