I did that thing again where I get way too drunk and go gay. Then wake up in the morning and freak out at the person. Yet another bar I cannot go back to
at last call she tried to get the bartender to fill her flask. when he refused, i had to stop her from trying to pour the rest of her beer in there.
don't judge, it's breakfast wine Wednesday.
Nypd just made jon and hayes chug their forties.
Walmart at night is scary enough without having to run into people you've slept with
The bartender asked if I wanted a to-go cup for my crown and coke.....I just realized I'm back in Montana and fuck did I miss home.
You know what a wolf looks like when it kills a small animal? How it shakes it around in it's mouth? I did that to a bag of Taco Bell last night
If I just skip sleeping, does hangover still happen? Gonna try it. Will report back. StTAND BY
There is a video on my phone of me suckling a bag of wine from your crotch area while you say "The Body of Christ" in a Michigan accent. I vaguely remember being offended by this yet I did it anyway.
I walked so much yesterday and I was like holy fuck I need to do some cardio apart from sex cause this is ridic
Waking up next to a guy you don't remember going home with and the first thing you say is: where is my tiara? = successful birthday
What's the rule for getting in fights with homeless men in suits?
Here's a rule: don't
I Woke up still tied to the bed. I would say, it was a good night!
The single life is the freaking dream dude. I'm sitting here naked, eating chocolate mousse, and watching Gilmore girls. It's wonderful
Sadly my Summer of Cocks is coming to an end
Randomize
