i watch way too much csi for them to even pretend to be my friend.
When she sits down, she uses her fat rolls like an arm rest.
His facebook status is an owl city song. I'm so glad i didn't end up fucking him.
I am gunna fuck the accent right out of her mouth
Mike is so stoned. I just heard him quietly mutter to himself "rock a piss" as he walked down the hall to the bathroom
time for you to cut the loving, understanding, non-judgmental crap and say/do whatever it takes to make sure I never, ever, ever sleep with him again ever
GOVERNMENT SHUTDOWN NO RULES ICE CREAM FOR BREAKFAST woooo!
So for St Paddys day I colored my junk green and got a little hat for him....wanna see it before I sober up....
You know she's gonna fuck shit up when she shows up in a neon wind-suit
The hotel had a helipad. Of course we had sex on it.
You should frame my arrest warrant.
It was after I slept with him he tells me he's a juggalo
Well it was nice knowing him
My mum just told me to stop being so pathetic and just find someone to have sex with, even if I don't like them, just be grateful for the sex. Wow.
dude i told her that I loved her...and she said, " go fuck yourself"
my favorite part was when you kept waving @ that guy and insisiting it was your cousin..and it wasnt and wondering why he wasnt waving back lol you were legit PISSED
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