he wouldn't shut up and let me sleep
yeah i got into a fight with my man last night
why can't men just shut up and put out?
I least I know I can't get pregnant because it's on my hair
you're in nursing school, now tell me what to do about a burned clit.
kinda considering buying a life alert for sophmore year
she asked me if i can do her a favor, came over, and gave me head then left. i still dont understand how that was a favor for her.
Yeah, but there's no serving sizes for dick.
These old men are woofing at me..PLEASE HURRY
I think online classes were designed around the concept of day drinking.
you tried turning the bar into a spelling b competition last night and every time someone couldn't spell something you would make them chug.
I think it's awesome that you're getting shower sex advice from a Mormon.
wow. there is a man who hates the post office more than me. he is causing a scene, this is a snapshot of elderly me.
She just asked to come over. She's either going to bring one of her dads guns and kill me or we're going to end up having insane lesbian sex.
UGH FUCK THIS TRAFFIC I WANNA SUCK A DICK
I'm going to be such a slut in Europe I've already decided
Send me dick pics. We'll make a scrap book
FUCKIN BIRDS ARE CHIRPING AT 4 IN THE MORNING. THE SUN ISN'T RISING YET MOTHERFUCKERS, GO BACK TO YOUR NESTS.
Randomize
