it was a weeks worth of wine for $20. it would have been fiscally irresponsible to not buy it.
Man when i saw they were the only ones hard core grinding to the Cha Cha slide against the wall, I knew they were gonna have sex tonight.
You asked him for a membership to him and his dick.
i feel like there is just so much pressure to sex him up, its like the weight of the world is on my vagina.
My favorite bartender added me on Facebook. Now he can clearly see how under 21 I am
But I wanna cuddle and just put my hand awkwardly close to your penis area by accident and look at you
So I went tanning and I burned my boobs.
They're like sad pomegranates.
Sometimes turtles just really trip me out man
idk. a stripper just bit me. I'm so disoriented
You made out with both twins? Ten points to you!
We set around a table in a hotel room and he spoon fed Molly to everyone there... I felt sketch for sec but then... Oh well.
I'm in the line at Chipotle thinking: "What combo will best prepare my body for the open bar I'm going to subject it to tonight?"
STAY IN YOUR APARTMENT. DONT GO TO SAFEWAY TO BUY CONDOMS. DONT GO TO THE VAN.
I emptied a Vyvance capsule into my coffee pot last night and set the auto start. Pretty sure I've been drinking meth all morning
According to Joseph, last night I crawled into bed and told him to pretend I'm his French maid, and then started speaking with a German accent, and referring to his manbits as "ze greatest Weiner schnitzel I'd ever seen". Basically, last night was a roaring success.
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