She has her iPod in her ears slippers and sweats on and is walking around the house up and down the stairs getting "exercise" she just stopped for a water break
I was giving him a handjob and he commented that he loved my nailpolish....I'm destined to die a fag hag
Taking shots out of pine wood derby trophiesssssss. best idea ever.
you kept telling her you'd make a great step-dad while cuddling her and rubbing her back...
Everyone is hammered wasted already...young, old, the dying, babies...we got them all
the condom is still stuck, that's what I get for being responsible
I think I just got propositioned for sex by the lady behind the counter at dunkin donuts
I made $130 by ordering two pizzas and charging them $10 a slice. If they weren't so stoned they might have realized they could have just ordered another pizza for $20.
Fulfilled a bucket list goal last night. Borrowed a dollar from a stripper to buy smokes
God bless Atlanta.
yeah well, its not like my astrogynecology class is teaching me what i need to know
im almost 90% sure there is no such thing as astrogynecology.
Dilemma. I'm out of wine and I can't put on clothes to go to the liquor store bc I just got spray tanned. If this isnt white girl problems I don't know what is.
I know this shouldnt be a problem, but there are too many women hitting on me. I dont know what to do
U dont jog and buy condoms n bulk
Have you actually looked at the corn flakes box? I don't think the rooster has a soul.
Sorry about kicking you last night but you don’t mess with a girls margarita bucket. Ever
Randomize