why the FUCK would i wear makeup on my vagina!?
And then the cop told me my court date was on 4/20. I said come onn u really gunna do me like that
I was going through my mom's high school yearbook...almost half the people who signed it referred to her as "Karen Smokejoints", "Confused Karen", or drew a picture of a joint. I have never felt more like her daughter.
I'm sorry, but the way we fuck, they don't make condoms strong enough not to break
Oh it's happening. I'm Chugging a beer while sitting next to a 6 year old
i talked to you about this last night, and you kept saying "he wants yo pusssaayyyyyy"
My gynecologist inadvertently complimented your penis.
You leave me no choice. Your vagina is grounded. It can just sit there and think about what it's done.
My drug dealer just texted me that his kid had a rough sleep and was running late to deliver the ounce to my office. Totes adorbs.
I cannot be this high in this house. This house has so many of my secrets in its walls.
Maybe I'll make your dreams come true and pee on you tomorrow.
I'll get him an axe as a present. So he can break out of his closet. That axe being my penis.
Well, I got drunk and told my family about what I expected sexually after a good first date.
So Saturday night after 10 drinks I guess he tried to have sex with me and in the middle of it I asked "can you tell I'm faking it!?" and then I sat up and threw up in my hand. That's a sex Win in my books
He ate me out in a golf cart while I watched the sunset. You are so right, golf skirts do provide amazing access.
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