Make note: the first date is too soon to make the "condoms are only for making balloon animals" joke.
She was lying in bed moaning while eating a Snickers and masturbating.
stop calling my apartment porn island.
dipping my christmas cookies in kaluha. santa would be proud.
I'm at your house, laying with your dog, eating taco meat, take your time.
Let's discuss options later this evening. I'll draw out said options and compare and contrast the "accessibility" of the costume for quickies. Because you never know. Halloween is full of surprises. I'll also compare practicality, level of skank, and creative features.
What the fuck could you be doing in that room to make her yell "Beginners Luck!" over and over again?
Just made a jeopardy bj game. Every question has 10-50 seconds on it and if he's right that's how many he gets.
I can wear a rubber suit at three am and spank someone's ass until its sore and fuck them three ways from Sunday. And get up the next day and do their laundry. As long as once in awhile they rub my back without expecting anything
Her rack rivals that of the deer I shot last season. You need to get after that.
The sex may be the only reason I like him. I've confused the multiple orgasms for feelings.
When dealing with embarassing medical issues, don't you want your brother's wife to be the one fishing around up your ass?
at least he now gets to tell people how he once threw a party so epic that the next day they had to clean some girl's body paint off the ceiling
And ANOTHER guy that I once got naked is doing gay porn now. Wtf? Am I the audition?!
Or is it distressingly heterosexual?
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