loyola was giving a tour this morning and they all saw me in a half ripped off toga throwing up over the side of the dorm stairs
you don't even go to loyola anymore
my roommate and her friend got reaallllly high last night and it looks like they played scrabble. one of their words is "nippal"
Just so you know, the bottle of red gatorade is NOT GATORADE. It is definitely someone's puke. I hope nobody else makes the same mistake I did.
I wish the inside of the tampon box said "CONGRATULATIONS YOUR NOT A MOTHER!"
she ate the whole pudding cup using only her tongue. i'm considering going lesbian for her
Drinking games this Saturday as usual although the ice cube tray game is banned due to last weeks incident
BEST FEELING EVER: Standing in a hot fucking shower, while super baked, while eating a cookie.
You eat cookies in the shower?
My chin is breaking out a bit and feels all itchy and burny like I'm allergic to something. Are you using a new lotion on your balls?
i cant believe we used adam and eve as a sexting theme last night
Im wearing a bra. Made of paint.
Anyone who has court these next few days keep your head up & smile knowing we broke the County Record with 27 underage consumptions
I'm honored that you could tear yourself away from your girlfriend's vagina long enough to text me.
I have the rest of my life to settle down this is totally time for friends and pizza
Why do I have "apologize to Dave Coulier" written on my hand?
You have no concept of how high I am, do you?
Randomize
