And hes hitting me with his balls, really hard.
Glitter + Penis = Best. Idea. Ever.
I left when they started reinacting what appeared to be a jerry springer episode
Pre-order weed for 4/20 and i'll give you a discount.
why is there cat hair all over my deoderant?
she wanted to smell more freshershest than you.
How many ice cream sandwiches is an acceptable meal replacement?
2.5
he can show you his cooooock\nshining, shimmering, splendiddddd
Dude.. full face helmets and hangovers do not mix... I am never going to get rid of the smell of puke.
I just saw a commercial for God of War and heard the nickname he gave my vagina.
In last nights drunken stupor i apparently purchased a luxury travel package for two to Australia. So uh...get a passport and clear your schedule for next month
...and that is the first time I've ever wished fewer naked women on someone I like.
Your final is gonna be as easy for you as getting into straight girls' pants is for me.
also I was promised more toga parties by popular media
I am passing the whore torch on to you my friend. Do me proud
While strippers were eating ones out of my boobs, several sources claimed trump shared classified info with the russians. We should get hammered on Mondays more often, bitch.
Randomize
