he put his p in my v, then his p in my a, and then tried to put the p in my m? first, double dipping is rude. second, i'm glad he finished shortly after that, i'm afraid of where he'd try to stick it next. my ear?
I wanted to google "huge banana" but I'm pretty sure all I'd get is dick pictures.
I know it sounds like a good idea, but doing Spanish homework at a bar just because the owners are Mexican and they give us margaritas really wasn't the best decision.
Fair enough. I'm gonna finish off half a bottle of Brunettes in the shower anf relive the good ol' days. We need a reunion
A guy with the name Pootie Tang winked st me and a guy that doesn't speak English messaged me. These are my choices?
I miss you too. And it was nice meeting your brother while I was mounting you
Whatever she smells like compost and feathers.
I believe they call that patchouli.
who started the 'put a scrunchy' around his balls' game?
I love you too! Remember NO alcohol or weed at my residence because of legal ramifications.
Instead of more alcohol, I decided to drink tea. Lets slow clap it out for me
Woke up eating a pickle on the bathroom floor this morning in some random guys sweat pants.
I just accidentally deep throated a popsicle in front of my parents
I've sold more douches working here than one man should sell in a lifetime
And by "I love him" I mean "I want his tongue down my throat.
So hungover that I might just sit in my car and wait until chipotle opens...in two hours...
Randomize
