So I feel bad, Ross is asking questions, I think they need to know it's a Spanish lesbian bar
Numbies before the dentist, such a good idea.
For the record, chili cheese fritos are not a chaser.
All I can remember is being told by a guy named Kyle to stay in the corner until the cops left. Then waking up on a porch outlined in beer cans 8 blocks from my house. Pregaming for college.
My neighbour is taking her hamster for a walk on a leash. Come over now
I dont think ive ever had a drunk day betray me so hard before
Ugh. I guess I'm crying loudly or something. My mom just came in and gave me milk, chocolate, a Xanax, and her weed "for the break up blues". Her ways of affection are so odd.
As yoda would say; A bitch, she is.
The only thing I remember from last night is being naked in his bed if that's not summer drinking at it's finest then I don't wanna live anymore
I was going to be upset with you on moral grounds but then i realized free chocolate was involved
I woke up not knowing what state I was in. Turns out, people from Deleware are pretty helpful.
We watched ESPN, hooked up, got waffles. You know, a typical weekend.
I can't believe you tried to cock block me from A DIFFERENT TIME ZONE.
everything I love is going to destroy me, so if coconuts are the answer, so be it.
Just do what I do and listen to your vagina. She’ll growl when she smells good dick
Randomize
