He had some BAD nuttage
Nuttage?
It's like cleavage......... but different
i have essays due online every friday...im just going to write 'im hungover' for every one
I'm drinking keystone with a homeless man I found. It's making me feel uncomfortable.
Woke up on the floor holding a sandwich. Shots. Never again.
Home remedy for the herp. Black tea. I need to strap teabags to my wang.
I'm making a contract of things you're not allowed to put in my ass
I don't care how old I am, if it's your 21st birthday I'm going to make out with you.
I walked in on you eating olive oil off of a plate. you gave me this look and I just started crying. we were that drunk.
Update: we are pushing the start of day drinking back from 9 am to 10 am. Minor delay.
Of course... Double fistin nati light cuz the powers out and it cuts down the times i gotta open the fridge... Genius
Who gives a hand job to a 19 yr old one night then the next lets a 31 year old random man fly a plane to town and pick u up and take u to dinner?
Stop touching yourself.
Wtf!?!?!?! Did you install a camera???
She said I had a really great aura. Which I think is hippie code for "I bet you can give me a mind melting orgasm"
Tomorrow we start training our livers for St.Patrick's day. May God be with us.
DON NOT, UNDER ANY CIRCUMSTANCES WATCH CLOWN PORN.
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