Don't feel obligated to get back to me but I think I just fell in love with a middle aged waitress at the Dennys in waco. She's used but in good condition.
She actually asked me 'is it in yet?' I deleted the vid.
i always forget that thursday isnt the weekend in the real world
Never have I ever before welcomed her period with such enthusiasm. She was starting to pick out baby names. She got me "What to Expect When You're Expecting."
I'm gonna get drunk and through up on the first happy couple I see.
We had sex in the bathroom. Then he told me I could watch him pee.
Yes my plan is to drink the college out of me so i can be an adult by monday
He is the one I "technically" lost my virginity to.
I feel like you never had a virginity..
you can think of my virginity as your little souveneir from our relationship.
I feel like i just got chewed up and shit out by a ukranian midget
To confirm, you are a grown ass man and you just asked me what her vag looked like.
Now that it's over, I can finally say it and not feel bad,dude. Her mustache is better than yours.
I wish I was there so i could bitch slap his incredibly sexy face
Yeah, so if you ever try to steal it, just know my tongue's been on it in several occasions. All over it.
I swam, I rode a bicycle, I rode a horse, I danced. It was like a real life tampon advert.
Randomize
