I bet him anal if they won...the one time Detroit decides to win, it had to be this week
I just saw the Donald Trump of homeless quys walking down the street. He had three shopping carts and a bike.
Mental note: adding peach schnapps to a gin and tonic does not "water it down."
downstairs . braiding the drunk passed out girls hair, she will thank us In the morning
but i'm paying and its not a date cause he's got a gf and i'm hooking up with his roommate tomorrow night
Whoever decided to wrap my shins in duck tape owes me new leg hair.
I have a completly random but serious question. Can I make a paper mache mold of you ass and turn it into a pinata filled with airplane bottles of liquor? Its for my art class
Just finished my quantum homework in ladies room writing with eyeliner. I am the party/physics champion.
Best feedback on my performance so far: "There are things that can't be unseen."
I'm pretty sure the girl in the stall next to me is waiting on me to leave so she can poop but I'm doing the same thing so it's like a Mexican standoff
I woke up and my backpack was empty. He used me for sex, and back to school supplies.
seriously considering getting an electric blanket rather than sleeping with guys this winter for warmth.
My lease is up and I've been thinking, it's only fair that the guys I've fucked in this apartment in the past year help me move. They enjoyed the bed, now help me move it.
Her new crush is a 6'2" guacamole baron that may also be a Jedi.
His sex game is strong it’s like a warlord’s dick! you know what I mean?
Nope
Randomize
