btw, i had a dream i drank 260-proof vodka last night. thank god that doesn't exist in real life.
You kept telling the cops that our ice luge was practice for the next winter olympics
All is not lost. The bondage chair came with repair seals and glue. It's like the knewwwwwww this would happen.
He said he was going to "rock my world". I wonder if he too has a false sense of confidence and accomplishment stemming from a complete lack of honesty from our own female counterparts.
Is your answer to that text seriously a right parenthesis
The other. Cat spoke to me and left. This shit is laced
The first cat might save me but they are taking out masks
Well girls crying gets you hard so you're not really a good standard to me
I bought a sword. Make the proper arrangements.
Did you get an erection too during Paul Ryan's speech?
He sent me a recycled dick pic! He could at least use one without sunlight in it, considering it's 10pm
Ok let me just clear up this blowjob thing first so we can talk about your grandpa
He got an erection from helping me mobilize my lumbar spine. I love physical therapy school.
Fuuuuuck dude, he’s got #Excel in his Facebook bio; I’m screaming
Is it just me or did we have a heart to heart talk while you were naked last night?
I am a unicorn in a field of flowers, you asshole.
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