i think the semi hot bartender might actually be a man in drag..on a similar note, what are you drinking?
I swear I am going to pee, wipe my vag with my hand, and then slap you in the face with it.
yea..i want to get out of new york for a bit too but for the love of god not to new jersey. that's like getting tired of the stripclub and getting yourself a toothless prostitute.
I just foul balled at work. I had taken off my coat too… had to go to the sink wash my hands then go back to the stall and pick up my coat. I hope the guy shitting in the stall next to me didn’t figure out what happened.
If you can't accept "I'm sorry I was mean to you" bjs from 19 year old girls, then who can you
and then some norwegians asked us to be in their porno.
I was trying to make tacos and friends but there was a major language barrier.
I was more than drunk as hell I have rug burn on my elbows from ninja roles on the ground..
Solid. Can't put a price on good times
You can and it's called a liver.
I tried snowmobiling at 2 am. I broke my glasses. You're right. Things do get out of control.
It's funny that when I fall down as an adult I'm so much happier no one saw than that I'm not seriously hurt.
Go to the bar. Find a girl. Ask if she can cook. Tell her you have a guitar at home. Ask her if she wants to see it. Bring her home. Sleep with her. Tell her it's your birthday in the morning. Enjoy your made with lust breakfast.
So my booty call knows your bf. Apparently they were in jail together
He told me to tell my ass that he loved and missed it, and even though he hasn't known it long, it might be the one for him
I mean his penis was perfect in pictures but its even more perfect inside me
Randomize