I've come to notice a late period isn't as exciting when you have no reason to worry
we were so high we made up an elaborate backstory because we were paranoid about going into the wig shop w/o being serious wig shoppers
Not really fighting over the same girl. He takes her out to dinner and then I come over and fuck her. We've worked out the perfect relationship.
me and my mom are sitting in the bank parking lot drying my beer soaked check with the heat... the whole car smells like heinekin and I'm trying to convince her I don't need a.a.
I have vodka an food stamps. At some point today, that will undoubtedly turn into jello shots.
The air was thick with penises
Preparing for the bar exam has made my whatever disorder you said I have act up again
I wish I could be at this cabin banging all these old dads
is it acceptable to cross the border for sex?
He tried to break dance on the island in the kitchen and ended up knocking over everyone's alcohol onto the floor then yelled "GUCCI" before vomiting
Bring me a cialis. .. I feel like having a super dick today
The moment when you go to plug in someone else's phone in your car and your lube is in the way. Don't mind that it's just my center console car lube. Normal.
I'm sorry about the spring break comment. I won't make anymore pornos, I promise.
Based on the conversation I'm going to assume you didn't close the deal.
It started going awry when I fell through a roof.
I'm floating on a rainbow and a purple elf is giving me advice. COME NOW!!!
Randomize
