he gave me an orgasm. multiple times. the weird stuff he did in middle school is now irrelevant.
I found my old addy guy via fb who clearly understands the supply and demand curve of addy during finals so he's gonna hook me up.
We got drunk before dinner. People at the other tables were praying for us.
Brought out my three foot martini glass last night, that explains why I haven't left my bed all day long.
Fuck him. I'll set him on fire for you. Then we'll see how good of a firefighter he is.
Then you started screaming that this was the first time you did e and that you had a 4.8 gpa, that was right before you almost suffocated between that one girl's tits.
she's traveling up the coast with her camera and a stash of pot cookies eating food from different campuses. said she slept in a closet 2 states away last nite... of course I'm interested
It feels like eating ice cream while riding a unicorn over a rainbow waterfall made of glitter.
That is possibly the gayest thing that was ever thought of by anyone anywhere.
dude you had a hot girl interested and took shots together, as soon as it went down the hatch you upchucked on her entire existance..
successful birthday. 2012 rules
I feel like despite his sleaziness I could be friends with this man. he just sent me a picture of his dog's balls.
tried to out drink an american air force weapons loader. never again
I can't even masturbate anymore!! That was my last source of cardio!!
Tempting guys with beer and cheese. How Midwestern are we?
The cops high fived after they tackled you
the orange of my hangover Tang is hurting my eyes... my coworkers knew it was hangover Tang too.
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