I just had to sit down with an 11 year old who threatened to dick slap a girl.
I'm the only one here who isn't hooking up, coming out of the closet, or crying because of one of those 2 things.
The only reason I'm still around is so I can grow a huge Gandalf beard when my hair turns gray
is it bad if I use the term bowl as a measurement of time, as in how long it takes to smoke a bowl?
You were playing beer pong by yourself. Finally someone took the ball and threw it into the bonfire. You sat by it, cried, and contemplated how to get it out. For 45 minutes.
Do you think my parents will accept my drinking habits more if I told them I like to drink every night because I take good shits the next morning?
I feel like everytime I call him he's either fucking or getting into trouble. It's really disturbing that he presses the answer button and then proceeds to fuck her harder.
how exactly do you say, "i only agreed to meet you for breakfast because i thought we could go to your place and fuck afterwards."
For the record we tried to find 4th of july porn. Did not turn out well.
Although I would ideally cut back on smoking weed, imagine what getting high and looking for our spirit animals would be like
Could we try to replay the decision making process whereby only you and I bought and drank a keg this weekend? Because there were some fundamental flaws!
She's licking the whiskey out of the carpet. I think we may be soulmates.
I've never wanted anyone to have herpes as I much as I want him to right now.
She made me pour olive oil on her.
I’m sorry, some of us common-folk don’t have access to steady dick
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