That cute girl I hooked up with last night clawed my back to hell and gave me a hickey. I look like a white trash warewolf victim
How much cunt could a cunt bag punch if a cunt bag could punch cunt?
I think youre just another guy trying to take advantage of a young naive innocent girl
you're not innocent... Once you have taken it in the turd cutter you can't label yourself innocent.
My male hookup buddy is gonna meet my female hookup buddy, let the awkward hookup games begin!
just got hammed at grandma and grampas 30th aniversary bash .. from the looks i was getting im guessing i wont be seeing an inheritance ...
Do you think if you have sex with a girl twin, her twin brother feels it to? Woke up at her house and they both have a look of disappointment on their faces.
I'm smoking a bowl with matches and a candle while my mother washes dishes downstairs. I thought adulthood was supposed to be different.
Ooo, yeah! Thanksgiving will be a blast. Can't fuckin wait for the next round of "have you found a nice young man yet?" Followed by a lovely helping of "don't worry, there's someone out there for you."
I mean. I'm excited for the Seahawks too. I just love nachos.
Do they still have sex clubs in San Francisco? Because that'd be an interesting way to spend Easter.
Is someone on their way here yet? I'm way too tweaked to be here alone
I had sex on a seadoo on the middle of the lake lastnight
Just got a handjob in the hospital
A new low.
I knew the bike rally would be fun when I saw "male pole dancing" on the schedule
Slowly dying because of my period and my phone is mocking me because I have 69% battery
Randomize