ive never been so in love with another man before, in a totally none sexual way... no homo
win or lose for butler, i'm still masturbating to brad stevens tonight
he told me he had a problem with me going both ways. like what the fuck. what guy says that to a girl? goodbye planned threesomes...
I don't want to have to force feed him my vagina!!
I was just expressing concern for your pickle consumption.
He blew a .19 and then slurred "well I did have some rum cake earlier today officer".
I was thrown in the air atleast 3 times by baby jesus
This is a rough morning for me
No, rough is puking in your froyo cup next to a five year old and her grandma.
I'm actually not sure I need to run today, between the crazy monkey sex and breaking into my own house.
He let me keep my Michael Jordan Bulls jersey on during sex.
I haven't been that free with the boobs since I was 19. I'm putting them away for a while.
If you insist
The one guy literally flopped my boob out. Yes I insist.
Is 28 too old to get fingered in Centennial Park? Asking for a friend.
Hahaha perfect. Let's start stopping drinking tomorrow
He finally left. I didn't introduce him to the roommate. The sex is bad. I don't want him to feel welcome
you said you didn't feel like drinking anymore so you mixed vodka with your applesauce and ate it
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