What's the procedure for failed threesomes? Do I friend her on facebook this morning?
I saw his package. It spoke to me.
Im def. not watching the CMAs. If Kanyes not gonna be there whats the point?
just had to take a 4 hour nap to write a one page paper. its obviously the week after winter break.
i think i left a case of beer in your dryer
I feel like everyone in class can tell we had a threesome last weekend.
blowjobs from left handed girls are noticably better than from righties. these are the most important things I've learned this semester
Tell her this is the Disneyland of penises.It's a magical place everyone should visit once in their life.
To give you an idea, there's a group upstairs trying to break down a door with their fists and heads.
please come back they are interrogating me about masturbation
Currently watching Zombie Sharks while high. This is why I love Shark Week.
So we hooked up and then instead of texting me, he endorsed me on LinkedIn for Microsoft Word a few days later
I just went to cvs and bought condoms, handcuffs and a coloring book
That's just how I roll. I drink, then tell people I'm either not wearing underwear or I'm training to be a stripper.
Never thought I’d use my computer science degree for teledildonics, but here I am
Randomize
