You hook up with other guys, let him talk to other girls.
no
You picked a bad night to stay in. ____ caught her hair on fire in ____'s birthday cake.
She had to stop drop and roll while two other girls beat the flames out. She might have a black eye
Street performer on bourbon st just lifted a sewer top so I could puke down it. I love New Orleans.
it appears as though my vagina has gotten the best of me again
I swear every time I make the effort to make my hair look nice, someone jizzes in it.
After throwing up in a tequila bottle on my nightstand (still not sure how she did that) she asked if she could slip into something more comfortable.
Also, last night I had a dream that I was in a victoria's secret fashion show and they made me wear a t-shirt over my lingerie. Spring dieting begins now.
on the way home I asked you what exit we get off at and your answer was "just like the goldfish"
by 11 am we'd already been drunk twice. how much lower can you go?
Look, I'm just saying, she looks like a troll and works indefinitely at a shitty Chinese restaurant, so me sleeping with her boyfriend is the least of her troubles...
It's disgusting. He breathes through his mouth and just sounds fat. Plus he chews all loud and shit.
I'd just like to inform you. That when I was at bvj the first day I was blackout drunk by noon. Get on past Chelsea's level like now. Do it for present Chelsea
Pooping with Eye of the Tiger playing. Not a single fuck shall be given.
Sorry for trying to wake you up by slapping your ass with a fruit 2 go.
I'll bring spiced rum
I am not drinking that devil juice
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