did you know you can prarie-dog a fart??
I just saw a girl licking a cheeseburger wrapper. dont ever let me get that fat
I just found pie in my hoodie pocket... This break needs to end.
Well now that I've given all the athletes mono there goes our chance of winning any conference championship
Let's just go topless and paint glitter over our nipples who the fuck cares
I'm riding in a wheelchair, being pulled by a golf cart. You need to be here.
Who topped off the "random beer mix" beer bong with a pinch of pepper?? All you could taste was busch and pepper...
This creepy guy was following me and i hid in the bushes. i could say i was high as an excuse but honestly it was straight up fun.
They said an hour before I even see a doctor...and they noticed the shots tally on my arm.
My vagina loves me do-dah do-dah my vagina loves me do-dah do-dah
I picture you throwing your vagina around in the same fashion that they pass out candy at a parade.
We were licking ciroc off the poker table
So Bodhi just sent me a pic of someone's balls with a message that says "I hope you all have a ballin' night." I don't even know what level of friendship to call this anymore.
Oh my god.
The ballsiest level.
I've orgasmed four times in the past 24 hours. And my mom's dropping off cookies later
The struggle bus crashed, rolled down a mountain, and went on fire, and I was on it ugh.
I dipped out before he woke up, but I made sure to take the pizza with me.
Randomize
