This girl is more easily done than said...
that speech was about as successful as her performance in twilight
Just saw a group of asian tourists in safari outifts bow in thanks to the starbucks guys. And no Im not high.
Going to a jewelry store high is not a good idea. I look like mr.t's wife.
i don't even specifically remember last night, it's just one big wonderful lesbianic blur.
I wish I had a "puke in your car" emoticon
I tried telling the cop that I don't do drugs, and that if he'd just take me home I could prove it by showing him my D.A.R.E. certificate.
I either just got free sex or a nice jail sentence. Text me in 10 to verify.
We jumped on a random trolley because total strangers offered us free vodka. We're not even on the route map as far as I can tell. I see now how those people died in "Hostel"... we deserve whatever happens to us tonight.
She was moaning so loud as i walked out of the room her roommates gave me a standing ovation... i think they are next
Hey to make you feel better about last night, I just shit my pants.
His dad gives me dirty looks whenever I come over though. I think it's because I eat his food and have sex with his son.
quick, give me some iron man trivia, i'm going to make this girl regret quoting tony stark in her tinder bio
Can you hurry up? Jamie just challenged my ex boyfriend to a duel and someone honest to God handed her a sword?
She didn't have her own?
EMERGENCY SUBJECT CHANGE. SHE DOESN'T KNOW.
Randomize
