will power is for people who don't want to get laid
do you know your status is "goal for vegas: hook up with a girl AND a boy"?
and THATS why i'm not adding my mom on facebook
I'm not saying I want a booty call. I just want what Cory and Topanga had.
I guess you don't remember pouring tequila in the dog bowl and slurping it.
please stop judging me for buying a handle of soco on a thursday at 10am. it was on sale, i'm thinking of my future.
It's also dangerous to ride a bike down the stairs after a few beers, but I've done it.
Can we dedicate this weekends marathon sexcapades to all the haters?
i can't understand anything he's saying. But he spells alcohol right everytime so i deciphered it.
Where the hell is he. I called him crying for weed and sex you would think that would signal some urgency.
I thought it was a drawer and tried to pull it out and it wasnt a drawer it was the police call button. I hate everything.
His idea of role playing was him wearing the halloween mitt romney mask while I gave him head
We made out a little and then he gave me some weed. I would say it was a pretty productive stop on my way home
I AM BEING ACCOSTED BY A HUMMING BIRD
I AM IN MILD DISTRESS
Found an elderly homeless guy with a Gandalf beard passed out on my porch. I put a Santa hat over his erect dick cause he was naked.
Everytime I give him head I make him rub my back. Teamwork at it's finest.
Randomize
