I had a dream last night that we were eating cake at Mercy...hahaha. I'm furious I didn't see you.
Mario Lopez is the poor mans Ryan Seacrest
A 21st bday and NYE should be illegal to have in the same week...
He started making shapes and faces with his cock and balls.... apparently if you wrap the shaft with your balls and turn it 90 degrees to the left it looks like a hamburger
3rd rule of buttsex she must be clean and shower recently
and skipped dinner
at what point did you see referring to the bartender as 'the white precious' a good idea??
Hah, I lost the lenses in my glasses, didn't event notice til this morning... How was the meeting?
Its not low standards. We're more of like a self esteem camp for average girls
Fuck your 100 proof Hot Damn. Do you know what 100 proof vomit tastes like? Anger.
That's the first time I've ever heard something that tickled both my gag reflex and my penis simultaneously.
Felt like shit, jerked off, felt ten times better. Being a guy rules. It's like I got all the demons out in 5 minutes.
I have a kicked-out-of-multiple-bars level hangover today
I have bad memories with every alcohol but we manage to work through the problems for the good of the relationship
After a crazy night, morning sex is just trying to find a position where you can thrust without getting seasick.
U wanna come over and watch talidaga nights. Ill make pancakes
What? It's 130 in the morning.
Aww come on i make bomb ass pancakes
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