all I know is if I don't watch spice world right now there will be a firefight.
DUDE DUDE I JUST GOT TH E BEST IDEA FOR A CHILDRENS BOOK "If You Give A Girl A Blow Job"
you were carrying a trash bag around insisting it was your purse. I'll let you guess how your night went
its no coincidence her full name and "cling" are the same in t9
I'm really proud of her, she waited until she was on tiled floor to start puking on the ground
btw good call for not making out for a pitcher of vodka, this hangover is bad enough
There's so much relief when you realize you wake up in your own bed
Well the pizza delivery man was either startled or incredibly intrigued to see me skateboarding in the living room by myself at 1 in the morning in ripped pantyhose
i sucked his cock and got snuggles in return. I'm the mother Theresa of giving in a relationship.
I'm honestly considering asking her if I can eat her out, as a friend.
Nothing worse then being at the gym on the elliptical next to a guy looking at porn on his phone
How's dinner? Come here? You can bring your boyfriend if you're ok leaving without him
Got drunk in Atlantic City Flagged down some guy with two wrapped tampons like road flares for a cigarette.
Okay but look at his jawline. I NEED TO RIDE IT.
WHY DON'T YOU WANT TO BE MY ESKIMO BRO
Randomize
