I'll forget this but out at 4am with a lesbian model at lil waynes bday party for the record
community service is like the breakfast club... except we're all the criminal.
Brickbreaker makes my post drinking poops that much better. Sorry, I had to tell someone who might agree.
And the cops told us we were all naked.
We decided to have a girls night of four lokos, three of us cried and the other puked
Its official. Iv'e been kicked out of a bar in every state. I would like to take my job and travel time for allowing this to happen.
Im only slightly posetive that left over guacamole and wine are unacceptable for breakfast at 6.30 am
I think my penis runs off weed. I haven't smoked it 3 days and I have no sex drive what so ever
I know. It was just so disappointing. I almost made it. And now the "when's the last time you peed your pants" clock has restarted. Lol
He brought over a bottle of tequila and a box of donuts with the Plan B, so I guess you could say things are getting pretty serious.
I gave him a HANDJOB.
But then he finished from a handjob in under two minutes so who's really laughing?
He just showed up in boxer briefs and loafers with only his phone and condoms
I didn't really understand how big 10 inches is. Now I know.
That same damn squirrel keeps staring at me like I did something wrong. Nature knows when you're hung over.
I just took a shot before my midterm. Gotta keep things in perspective.
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