Skip Greektown and come to Geektown. I just want to cuddle.
I'm afraid we're only dating because we're too lazy to look for anyone else.
what happened last night??
everyone saw ******'s vagina
and that's just the beginning
Dibs on passing out in front of the toilet.
As im putting my laundry in the machine, i find a solo cup and a pong ball that i signed babe ruth
rumor has it I kept asking you to go to the "tall grass" with me...sorry about that.
I honestly don't know if ill make it through the next two hours. The hangover is strong with this one.
Made myself shower before I'd masturbate. I probably should have wined and dined myself too, but that's pushing it too far.
Dude if i sent you a picture of the inside of my fridge would you be able to break down and explain everything that was in it?
I really want some funfetti cake but I feel like its more socially acceptable to go out and drink
Is her dick bigger than yours?
His weed is so good that I don't wanna risk loosing him as my weed man so I plan to keep him in the friend zone 😂
Guys are like someone else's baby; i'll play with them but if responsibility is involved i'll hand them off.
I called him the wrong name all night, yet I still got a ride home from the party and hooked up with the guy. I'm irresistible.
But I think I successfully seduced her with my alias.
Randomize
