don't you miss dr. quinn: medicine woman? i do.
We need to either start getting drunk more often or one of us need to start doin drugs
Wtf? Why?
I want awesome conversations to show the world.
he mailed me a thank you note for the blowjob.
She's never allowed to turn 21 again
dude you cant keep breaking into my house just to raid my fridge.. especially at 3AM.
When the doctor said the anal leakage might not be reversible without some lifestyle changes you start asking if it's worth the entertainment value.
I'm currently trying to decide if crown or wild turkey will hurt worse coming back out through my nose later.
Everything smells like blood and olive oil.
I threw up in my closet when I was hammered last night. Like a fucking toddler. I can't play with the grow ups.
That's not fair! You can't come over after you just had sex and rub my dry spell in my face!
I just sent an "I'm sorry I forged a prescription in your name" email. It was one of the more awkward things I've done this week.
He's interpretive dancing to Crazy by Britney Spears and expressing his feelings for either me or the guy next to us
I think he was trying to be romantic, but the candle he had lit was the kind you use to repel mosquitoes..
There are 6 of us in a mini cooper and his maid is in the trunk...she needed a ride.
Question: the touchscreen on my phone randomly quit working, do you think this could be a latent reaction from me peeing on my phone last weekend?
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