She was drunk and kept trying to talk while I was in her mouth. It sounded like the teacher from a Charlie Brown cartoon!
Just met a girl...She is complaining why on facebook you can't have more then one "open relationship"
I dont know how i feel about her from a moral standpoint...
She said "I only hook up with guys I'm dating"
So... What happend then?
We dated for an hour, i broke up with her after. BOOM.
I wish I could save this moment forever and have sex with it regularly. Its just tht beautiful.
SHE has hooked up with both me and my sister. I don't even know what to say. If she goes for my parents next I may have to kill her
He explained how that handle got into our fridge. I think i'm going to stick with my original assumption that the vodka gods want me to drink more vodka.
Omfg amy I'm not kidding you I think a blow job is what landed me in the hospital
Although I feel like awkward kinda describes your entire sexual history...
Just got to Evans to buy weed. His mom showed up unannounced. Now the three of us are chillen. Super.
I'm gonna chug this bud light an might injure this high school penis, like I'm 17 again
I know he’s a bad decision but he's casual, his penis is amazing and his technique is on point.
I woke up naked with my work shoes on
I'm soaking her vibrators in tabasco and wasabi paste. "furious" is an understatement
Never joke about your clitoris.
What did you spend the night in her closet?
She said she was saving me for breakfast and locked me in there
Randomize
