i feel like im doing the pre-walk of shame..like every car that drives by is like, ooooo look at that girl, in that itty bitty dress, yep shes about to get her skank on tonight...
If your still trying to figure out the moment I stopped caring; it was the point in which you said "I really wasn't sure whose baby it was"
Since when do you wear a bracelet?
Not a bracelet. Half a pair of handcuffs
after I pulled back my foreskin she said, "cool like a transformer". I really like her now.
I'm pretty sure my penis yawned halfway through. That loose.
Life lesson. Learning to pee left handed is easier than learning brickbreaker left handed. Rather lose a few drops than a few lives
He just told me he's been drinking vodka at work all day. I'm starting to believe in soul mates.
I actually enjoy jerking off to her facebook more than I enjoy actually fucking her. Just something with our generation
Its ok. I handled the situation with grace and class. lol jk i got shitfaced and fucked his roomate.
You offered me some of your "Jungle Juice." It was just 151 and Absinthe. I don't know how you are still alive.
No, the responsible one does not yell out "lets go to iHop" at 5 in the morning to a bunch of drunk people with munchies.
i only avoided him because he looked like he was about to have a heart attack and i didnt feel like doing cpr on my day off.
what type of emt are you
He was spooning with the dog when I came home. Now shes afriad to go near him. Should I ask?
I think I just scared the sex out of my booty call. He saw me at the grocery store using one of those "future mother" parking spots right next to the handicap ones. He just made eye contact and drove off. I regret my laziness.
I didn't really break out of the friend zone, as much as I blasted the doors off with high explosives and rode through on a grizzly bear...
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