Nope changed our mind. Decided your strange bacon like body odor wasn't what we want to smell tonight.
you took out flashcards at the bar and went around asking guys what totalitarianism meant.
i hope someone procrastinates by putting up the pics up...
sarah said she can't even post all of hers due to facebook indecency rules
I cant believe you went home with her.. Your poor immune system and the shit you put it through.
A white limo full of drunken 30 something business people pulls up next to me and asks if they can kidnap me until 1030. If I don't make it back tonight, call someone and tell them I died gloriously
God I hope my hair dresser doesn't realize that all these hairspiration pictures are from gay porn blogs on tumblr.
I'm getting shit face wasted, and I have to be up so early tomorrow. I am bad at smart.
When you get to his house tomorrow, follow your instincts. Find the cat first.
Yea he called the cop officer fonzarelli and asked him if he was mad because happy days was off the air. Boom, beaten and arrested
I fucking hate you. Some slutty looking drunk chick backed her ass up across the bar and started grinding on you. You ignored her because you didn't want to share you drink
I care about my drink far more than her feelings
Found an old burrito under my bed
You are a sick fuck
Bring a bathing suit and your good liver.
My good liver is still at the dry cleaners. Will my backup liver suffice?
Maybe
My body looks like ricotta cheese had a vacation
he literally walked in took a shit and left ringing the 'great service' bell on the way out.
Next time we do shrooms i am finding an open field at sunrise and running through it and nobody is stopping me this time!
Randomize
