how the fuck did you end up in georgia? you were here at my party dry humping some chick 2 hours ago
so you mean to tell me that there is no way you can get me?
i seriously just saw a stripper from last weekend walk into the classroom next to me!!
mom and dad are leaving for florida on 4/20, this is a sign
He freaked out when I started to orgasm. He said he never knew girls could orgasm too.
Its not christmas eve unless I give him head. I wont take no for an answer
He bought me Ben & Jerrys and then apologized for the fact that he was going to fall asleep before we could have sex
It was just a friend comforting a friend. Except his penis was inside of me.
I might have been fine if i had magic teleportation powers and could have skipped the car ride between bar and home
This stranger told me I should "start playing for the other team" and then continued to talk to me about the joys of being a lesbian
I found my hair extensions. They were in my hamper.
Learn from me. When going to a booty call do not wear a belly shirt. Nothing says shame like a belly shirt at 7am.
That is was cool to fuck the single mother accross the street until every girl i bring home gets the car keyed.
There is a 97.5% chance that my sketchy roommate is also a hooker.
So when can I meet her?
I'm right down the road from AJ's old house and I'm getting mixed feelings. My vagina is remembering good dick. But the rest of me is remembering horrible times.
At leat we can cross off 'having sex in a classroom' on our bucket list.
Randomize
