he just asked me if he could show me what he wanted to do to me using his action figures. where do i find these freaks?
Woke up in a closet. I'm not drinking till summer.
She gave him HEAD floating down the river in a tube as big a a tire. I just don't know how to compete with that sort of level of slut.
My girlfriend was pissed, so if I had to guess, i'd say I had a GREAT time last night
They walked in to the store, ripped up the phone book, and left. Can we get on their level?
Oh eartly, In cocy youtu youchv make the wallflowers d tskunks!y, couch protection now,.sryou should feel special !
You grabbed her hand and started jacking her finger off. She was horrified.
Did it finish?
She was purple for Halloween. She literally spray-painted herself purple and called it a costume. It won't come off.
The squirrels are partying on my roof again. Now they're just rubbing it in that I'm home alone on a Saturday night and they're having orgies.
GOIN TO BED BEFORE TEQUILA BLEEDS FROM MY EYEBALLS
I know what I want to do this Friday. However, it might end in me getting kicked out of an arcade and a mini golf course.
Who wakes up at 9 and says "let me send a pic of my dick to my ex gf"
I'm in love. Her name is Jamie. She's beautiful. She punched me in the face.
Did u puke in a church parking lot? And go to the wrong funeral yesterday? Lol
Im not as flexible as I once was, but I still managed to get eaten out in the front seat of a hummer behind keddies.
Randomize