the power's out. i'm smoking weed by flashlight
i wish i was dedicated to anything like you are to weed
I've blown a few things in my day
he was in the bathroom singing "will it floooaaat?? will it floooaaat?!" turns out that's a deal breaker for me.
we got our roommate high for the first time. He went into his room alone and watched Malcolm in the middle for three hours
I was high enough to understand and function with 'flip' while playing brick breaker
Damn. I don't think I could ever be that high.
He just reenacted his orgasm in front of my roommates....using a squeeze bottle of mayonnaise.
I just found blacked-out interviews on my voice recorder. Go journalism.
Guess who just got a Christian Beliefs class to seriously discuss the spiritual implications of dolphin rape?
It'll be a romanticized airport meeting until I'm judged for sitting on his face in the terminal
What if he turns back to me, finds me seemingly fondling my breasts, and thinks I'm turned on by eagles?
I was chasing disarono with Bacardi and watching ice cube movies. It would have been an epic birthday if I wasn't by myself and actually had some decent friends.. Hint. Asshole.
I JUST LIKE FLANNEL, NOT VAGINAS! OK?
I WOLD FCUK YUO INTOO THE MOON
THE MOOOOOOOON
I tried to be mean but not so mean that he won't bone me next weekend
I think he has some internal "man stuff" that keeps getting in the way.
Like alcoholism and general douchbagary.
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