What ever happened to making out with a few boob grabs here and there?
Hey babe, chan wants you to stop texting her about the size of TJ's dick. please.
he threw up on me, hugged my legged and then started laughing. when i asked him why, he said "it's like the sour patch kids commercials."
There is literally a guy in my class with a gallon of water and a trophy.
i'll just tell him I slept with them both because we needed to compare notes
You weren't just peeing. You were like grinding on it. And you tried to pee in the washing machine first.
We see some guy emerge from the forest on the island this morning, alone, in only a snuggie. Morning shots and bagels on us for the number one walk of shame.
I just got head while watching air force one. Harrison ford would be proud.
I went by my nickname in rehab. It made it feel more like summer camp.
you went to ralph's and bought all of their pears and left them outside my house
I'm just trying to win a butt plug dude
I wanna die. I can't recall the last time I was happy that doesn't involve your hand touching my butt.
Well. I had to explain to my niece that the word cunt is not an abbreviation for country. I'm the best aunt in the world.
I'm a grown ass woman. Treat me like one. Fuckboy
FYI there's a girl here with happy daddy written on her tits
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