Wanted to apologize for chris browning you when you were on my computer.
it seems that i get a boner from just about everything now
i'm unexpectedly in a limo, eating poutine. the driver just offered me coke. good idea?
I wonder why dictionaries dont have indexes to help find the words easier.
She just used a turkey baster to transfer alcohol from the glass to the bottle. Just thought you should know
i was like hansel and gretel. i puked a trail from mcdonalds to our place so i could find my way back in the morning
My gym is having a pizza and beer party. God im starting to love this place.
There was a reason that "Throat Warrior 2011" was written on my martini glass. He said my title was undisputed.
Even though he was watching you pee on his bedroom floor, you kept denying it and saying he was dreaming
I woke up to her screaming at the various pictures of nutsacks she found on her camera
Sex on the scooter in the parking lot wasn't the smartest idea. Actual quote from the cop as he handed me the ticket and fist bumped me.
Sneezing cum all over the table was not the highlight of the family reunion if that tells you anything
His dad and I had a drunk conversation about life. At 4 am he told me that I was 21 and cute and should fuck whoever I want.
oh i see... well this is a positive first step in you courting him for sex.
Its like your face is a pile of corn and I'm a chicken
...What??
Randomize
